Get off the pot

Imagine a place where the bathrooms barely function. The ancient, foot-pedal flush systems are hard to operate, so waste builds up. The stall doors get stuck closed, so people have to crawl out — and end up with urine from the floor on their clothing.

Sounds like a dive bar on the Lower East Side, right? According to DNA Info, it's actually a building in Washington Heights that houses two public schools: Dos Puentes and Juan Pablo Duarte elementary schools.

The city's answer? Kids, you're going to have to hold it in — at least until the end of 2015. That's when they say a $2.8 million renovation not slated even to start until the coming spring will be complete.

The irony is that Dos Puentes was recently hailed for its membership in the International Spanish Academies by Schools Chancellor Carmen Fariña, who brought Her Majesty Queen Letizia of Spain for a visit. Good thing for everyone the Queen didn't need to use the throne during her stop.

And just as well she didn't ask about student performance in the building, either. For Juan Pablo Duarte, only 11 percent of students met state standards in English and only 10 percent did so in math. Dos Puentes is a new school with instruction in English and Spanish. It has only a few kids, and no performance numbers yet.

But ask yourself this: Should moms and dads be expected to believe that the same New York City public-school system that can't even give their children a clean and functioning bathroom be up to the job of ensuring their kids actually learn?

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