Ok, you've tried everything to get your teen or pre-teen to keep up with their school summer reading list. How about tucking one or two of these titles into the book bag to get them started?
Let's cut to the chase: California-based BOP magazine is 109 pages of like, TOTAL nonsense. But it's the kind of stupid trash that tween girls lap up and we'd love to get paid to write this garbage. One Direction's Niall Horan talks about his first kiss. "I was really nervous," he spills, remembering a French student when he was 12. One Direction's Harry Styles says he "definitely" would kiss a girl on the first date. Yay! Elsewhere there are pictures of readers with celebrities, celebrities being silly, celebrities talking about how much they love their moms. There's a feature on how much time Justin Bieber spends thinking about girls. We think he spends more time thinking about animals. BOP, published by Laufer Media, is less interesting than the list of ingredients on a Skittles packet.
Tiger Beat is still in the teeny-bopper magazine elite, and it's better your kids learn about their favorite stars through this clean version of gossip than, say, through TMZ. There is no Beebs relieving himself in a mop bucket is all we're saying. In Tiger Beat he's visiting cancer patients. Parents are going to want to have a look at the magazine to see who their children are idolizing, and to stay up on the lingo. Like "1D" — if you don't know what that means you are not a cool parent. It is One Direction. Remember, Harry is the one with the floppy hair, and though Horan looks like Ross Lynch, they are not the same person. You'd know that if you read TB, and you'd understand what is going through your tween's mind all the better.
The one good thing we can say about this issue of J-14 is that it comes with a pack of stick-on tattoos and nail decals that are, like, totally cool! Seriously though, the mag is pure, unadulterated fluff, which isn't a bad thing — although we do wish the articles came with just a tad more heft. Yes, squeezed within the piles of the pretty boys (and some girls) are actual strings of words, including a story on how Ariana Grande of Sam & Cat (whatever the heck that is) is also insecure and wants girls to know she doesn't always look perfect. Awww? One can also read the bizarre and disturbing story about the 18-year-old British student Xenna Kristian who says she was beaten up at school, including a bruised jaw, because she is a Taylor Swift lookalike. Huh?
Bauer knows the recipe for a successful pre-teen magazine and this month's M covers all the bases. It'll certainly clue you in on what your tween daughter or granddaughter is mumbling about this summer. Part of Bauer's Teen Group, M and its editors know you have to splash all the current stars — One Direction, Swift, Selena Gomez and Bieber — on the cover, give some "exclusive" photo peeks into the "real" lives, call everyone by their first name and, most important, never show any blemishes, physical or emotional. It's a big happy world, just the way a pre-teen girl likes it. M scores on all fronts. For a little seriousness, the editors offer up "The Best Advice My Mom Ever Gave Me" and "I Want a Barbie With My Body Type." It's a must summer read for young girls, and their parents — who know the title is a gateway drug for Teen People and then the hard stuff, People.
The New Yorker contends airily that "human interaction is the key" to curbing death in childbirth in the third world. Likening the "puzzle" to the slow adoption of sterilization by doctors in the 19th century because of its inconvenience, writer Atul Gawande concludes the deaths of mothers and their newborns could be ended by better education. Maybe Gawande is just being polite, but it would seem obvious to us that all of these problems are less of a puzzle than they are about money. If you want to know what big money's thinking, check out how it's funding birth control in the Third World.
If New York's double issue on sex is any indication, we're all using smartphones to cheat on our fiancées and spouses in the kinkiest ways imaginable. Yes, it is a little tedious, and we especially wondered why more than two pages were devoted to the ramblings of a serial cheater, which added a tinge of the depressing to the package. Elsewhere in the what-else-is-new department, a gloomy essay asks whether "everything we've come to think of as American is predicated on a freak coincidence of economic history." Let's ask the recent college grads with their $1 trillion in debt.
Time puts the Trayvon Martin story on its cover, with a fairly good package that surveys the nation's black church leaders, among others, on the dicey aftermath. Meanwhile, another story that is of seismic significance gets a nice write-up, namely the phenomenon of Pope Francis. "Francis' unabashed championing of the poor and his criticism of the heartlessness of financial markets have had the effect of returning the church to its ancient strength: the pursuit of social justice," writes Howard Chua-Eoan. This is a story to watch, and Chua-Eoan has been out front every step of the way.
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